Aleah Toews continues to hold onto the memories of her son, Alex, and is now recounting her journey through pregnancy loss by creating a children’s book.
Alex was born still a year prior to the birth of Toews’ 2½-year-old daughter. Penning “Still Your Heart Will Grow: Loving and Grieving a Pregnancy Loss” aided Toews in coping with her sorrow and addressing her daughter’s queries.
Toews expressed that the pain of losing Alex will always linger, emphasizing the importance of providing her daughter with the context to comprehend her emotions during significant events like Alex’s birthday or challenging holidays. Clinical psychologist and University of Manitoba Professor Kristin Reynolds echoed Toews’ sentiments, stressing the need for open communication to prevent self-blame or misconceptions, particularly among children.
“Still Your Heart Will Grow” narrates a tale of a mother and daughter reflecting on a family photo album, where the daughter learns about a lost sibling through a picture of her pregnant mother. Toews incorporates a fox character symbolizing the departed child to convey their enduring presence.
Reynolds highlighted the prevalence of pregnancy loss, such as miscarriage and stillbirth, underscoring the significance of age-appropriate discussions to help children grasp and process such sensitive topics.
Reese Dyck, founder of the forthcoming Southeast Postpartum Centre in Steinbach, who has experienced multiple pregnancy losses, praised the book for facilitating conversations with her young children about their lost siblings. Dyck emphasized the necessity of addressing miscarriage and stillborn support, a service the Southeast Postpartum Centre intends to provide.
Both Dyck and Toews emphasized the need for more open dialogue surrounding pregnancy loss, hoping that their stories and initiatives will spark meaningful conversations across different age groups.
Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, observed internationally, serves as a poignant reminder of the delicate nature of pregnancy and the importance of acknowledging and discussing the reality of loss.